Egyptians what do u think about arranged marriage (gawaz salonat) does it work and what should girls do ?

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Moonrise

i think it is a very successful way for young ones to know , choose , and accept each other .
recently , a girl from a good family who has completed her education had a kind of arranged meeting with a distant relative .
he had graduated from the AUC , got a job in a reputable good paying company .
both needed a decent , well brought up spouse .
a relative of both arranged a meeting for the girl and the guy within the context of the family.
they met , liked each other , and got engaged within 3 weeks , ma sha allah .
the chemistry worked , the families accepted the union bec they were compatible .
there is no prescription as to what to say or do in the 1st meeting .
it is a gathering like hundreds of meetings , but it isnt by chance .
the conversation is natural for both sides bec they have social skill.

this kind of arrangement is the best for conservative , religious families that dont allow girls to mix with boyfriends .

G. #2

I personally don't like it.

Dryest Flame

i didn't married on this way and i think if i wasn't married by now i will never take that step but let me tell you it works with many other people that means it work.many families don't accept love relation or "hey dad there is man i know he want to marry me" in some families it will end in tragedy way so in this case that kind of marriage is very good to them beside its not that bad or not 2 dogs in cage they are only different type of peoples who accept to get married by this way and i can tell that most of this marriage is successful one you can say its chemistry or i think cause both of them want to get married i mean in many love stories the man married very young so after a while he think he didn't live the life he suppose to live but in that case 2 people want to get married so they stand together in front of anything to make it successful one.

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@im different:lol ididnt thumb u down but any how u know gurlz always 3andhom 7asasya mn word cage so its not good to say it as we put animals on cage so instead use under spot for example any way as u said lkol ka3da shwaz and yes it may work for other as i said i know with my personalty it will never work for me but i cant denay it works for some people very well and also let me tell you the love you know is totally different than the love which grow after marriage as i married my husband after a great love story but believe me the love which grow between us after marriage is different and better than the one before marriage so i this relations they love each other but a different kind of love its not that hot one we see on movies or we already have it in our life but its more responsible love like the one we have after marriage its love also but another kind dont worry one day you will know it

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@im diffirent:ur thought in love is true also i can neglect it but every one love with his own way msh 3arfa 7atfhmny wala la2 bs homa aw el no3 da mn el nas hwa da el 7ob 3andhom 3la fekra ana msh bdaf3 3anhom but de fekrtk enta 3n el 7ob we de tare2tk 3'erk la2 fe wa7d ygeb l mrato warda we fe wa7d tany y2olk kilo kbab 27san ya3ny etfrg 3la film 27la el 2w2at we sahr el lyaly bgd they both translate it very well

Tribal Angel

personally i don't agree with it ..

but it seems to work for some people ..

I AM DIFFRENT . . .

i hate this kind of marriage ... its like "sorry" putting two dogs in a cage .. and hope that they like each other .. so that they can go on in life just like other people ... there is no passion in that kind of relationship .. where you just follow the routine... work .. marry ... get kids... die ... but if you found that one ... how fills your life with happiness and joy ... that would give both of them more power to stand infront of the difficulties of life ...just because when i get back to home .. tired ... someone runs at me and gives me a bigggg hug :D " I know u ll say in real life nothing like this happends ... but i m Diffrent :) i ll make it happend ... i cant live in any other way ...

on the other hand ... it would be a useful way in the enclosed society or for aged women "but i guess that would humilate her more"

people say that they will love each other after life ... but that not true

if they loved each other b4 life .. after 20 years they will be just like any 2 married people "maybe deppressed and sad" but they would have all the love memories happend at past

if they married without love ... they just become a regualar married couple from the first year :)

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sorry but it is ... gurls usually likes to have attention ... likes so much to feel that guy is lookin at her all the time .. askin about her .. then when he asks for an engagment .. she feels precious ... in the cage .. she just bypass all these feelings and just test the prospect ... while he is testeing her too !!!

but anyway .... lkol ka3da shawaz ... might work for some one else .

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i dont like to be the one who sees him self the only right but i was amazed when i saw six people thumbed me down .... thats funny ... these people dont want to love the person they would marry .... i guessed something ... maybe they already forced to go into the cage and marry someone they didnt love ... maybe they are trying to convince themself that they did the right thing so that the dont collapse infront of them sadness :)

please note that i said sometime it works ...
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:D sorry flame and all gurls for using "cage" but its how i imagined it ... and i hate so much people how think that they are perfect because they use their mind more than their heart ... and they should calculate everything and whats they are gonna benfit from this marriage ... thats why egyptians divorce too much ... we dont know each other ... we m2drsh tb3an a3rdek fl oltih 3n el gwaz ... ur the one with the experience ... but .... sorry ya3ni ... the words u say is the words i heard from my parents and their parents and so ... what make love interface with responsiblites ... people in europe kiss everyday even when they reach 80 ... do we do this ... love for is something we should neglect inorder to get other benfits ... "Love ... if its not madness ... then its not love" maybe my thoughts will change when i get my first impact with real life ... but unlike other people ... i wont let go and say a3y 3esha we khlas ...

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yes ana shoft el flmeen dol ... bs fe film akhr el aw2at 3mal eh fl akher .... gab el ward ... we m3ah kilo el kbab :D ... we ana 3ref enk btdf3y 3anhom we ana olt en mmkn el tari2a deh tkon m3 nas tania ok ... lkn el tabi3y fl donia ... ene ay 7d bytbst gdan lma 7d byhtm beh we y3ml ay hga 3shn ykon mbsot ... fe el 7ala el hya gwaz salonat .. msh hykon feh kda l2n el mwdo3 mn el awal hyb2a ma7soub ... ht2ol mslan ya3ni ... hala2i a7san mno feen ... m3 floos we byshtghal shoghlana 7lwa .. we most2bal hayel .. ok anamwf2a ... we b3den ... htetgwzo .. we tb3an kol wa7ed fl awal hy7wl ykol lenafso ... dh ana kda rbna ymlni b32li .. etgwzt gawza kwisa we aho most2bli kwis we ay 3esha wl slam .. msh ht7s bel e7sas ele bykhli kol ensan wasek fe nafso ... we 7ases en el donia gamila ... el moshkla 3ndna enena dyman bn2dr nbrar lnfsna e7na leh bn3ml ele e7na msh 3yzeno ... i hope ene akon fhmtek .....

Reikominder

I must say it clearly,

Both types are good btw,

Type A:
People who accept what they can get from life, who doesn't have many dreams or goals to achieve, people who just want to live a good life and that's it, and those people when married by this way "salonat" and if they liked each other then i think they will have successful marriage, bcoz they will not think about "what if?" or "It would be better if i marry this or that" , and i think they will make a good family,

Type B:
People who care about the meaning of life, they need to feel happy, they don't want to woke up one day after marriage and say "why i married this man? I'm totally different and we can't understand each other, I thought he is not like that" , people who can suffer from life problems but are always having dreams and feelings, they don't like to live in a " Heaven cage" , this people will lose many things in their life , but i think they will gain freedom, but sometimes freedom is not everything, bcoz if you are flying alone then you will not feel happy, anyway, people like that will not be happy in this way of marriage,
It depends if you are type A or type B, if you are type A then I think it will works, if you are type B then better to avoid such way except when you feel you are getting old and in this case you will change to type A :) lol

marie n

each rules can be right or wrong, i couldn't say it is wrong. But the important is to be honest and to look to the girl as a human being not a peice of cake in a shop, and the same for the girl, the man isn't the handsome person..don't search for the appearence. look for the personnality, the education (not which faculty he/she graduates from).

and because we are an open society, you can hav some time to know each other before taking the decision for an engagement

Agamemnon1969

As long as each of them agree, who are we to judge? Hopefully the couple are not cousins though. The chances of genetic problems are too high...just a friendly reminder from an old guy.

Princess Moro

I'm totally against it!

Wise Heart

I don't like it personally and it doesn't mean it's bad.

my reasons: This is the traditional way for marriage in Egypt. Now it's not suitable for these days. The results of not updating our traditions and filtering it, is one of the highest rates of divorce in the world {Specially in Cairo and Alexandria} it's more than 50% now. That means we should think much and change much, it's not only the economical effect, it's the old stoned minds of parents who wants just to keep traditions more than religion or logic.

I think if we don't want to learn from Europeans about simplicity in marriage, we should at least learn from the Palestinians living in Gaza how they get married while they are under continues attack.

Adam

ok Arranged marriage,, isn't that l when two people get married at the first time they meet is on the wedding day??? coz that's what some siri lankans and indians do?? gawaz salonate? isn't that when a Friend of the family says i have an arees or aroosaah for you??
well i think that is an excellent idea as our fathers and grandfathers generation did it, and there was diversity in family's rather then having mum and dad are both from the same faculty of uni, both are from the same city, both are the same in everything... and the rate of divorce was extremely low because this method...

so yeah when it does happen just be yourself
and one time meeting is never enough, and if u do get rejected its not an embarassing situation at all,, we are all different, i shouldnt get offended by rejection of this method,,
it is better then getting married in the first place then getting rejected after woods.

mesho f

marriage is a social system depends on partnership, so gawas el salonat is such a kind of marriage, and most probably successful more than marriage on love base.
the reason is : two partner didn't expect much from another so if someone do sweetie thing the other will be very happy

Egyptian Pharaoh Rossoneri 4ever

I find it completely normal in Conservative society like Egypt where most families still refuse the idea that there daughters have boy friends.I don't have any problems with it. And it works most of the times rather than other types of marriges !!

Sandra

I'm against this kind of marriage, and i wonder how men accept it and why. Nowadays, the society is opener than before and the girl and the guy could meet every where, in university, in club, in work.
so , among all these channels , a well educated, successful man cannot find a suitable bride, his charming princess . i think that marriage depends on emotions and feelings , how can i love someone if there are many eyes supervise me. besides, the situation will be very embarrassing for the girl if the man doesn't like her. (and also for the man if she refused him)
i think that this kind of marriage is like a man who go to the market to buy a kilo of tomatoes or fruits , he sees lots of kind to choose the best one. usually, the standards in this marriage are the family reputation, education, and financial situations and not love ,feelings, and personality.
how they will discover the bad things in each other?, both act and try to show the good side of them before the two families.
the problem that sometime the girl doesn't accept the groom and her parents accept and they enforce her to marry him. does any man accept to marry a girl against her will?
I refuse it completely

naxo100

Though i married by a { modern method} yet i think gawaz elsalonat is more stable
I noticed this in many nearby families and relatives

Luli

I think that they are sad. Marriages should be based on love, and respect, and passion. It is so hard to find those, takes so long to find it. It's awful that some people never get to experience that, just because they were unfortunate enough to be born in such families.

samy n

it is the best type of marriage if it happen under family control,,,,it is better for high educated busy peoples,who have no time to mix with others,,,,,,,alsoyou shal see a new girl without any past on your mind it will be new stage for both of you

Cindy D

arranged marriages anymore don't have to bad most of the time the parents really try to think about there kids and being happy. It is a reflection on the family if it doesn't work

Juliet(still waiting hahahah)

i have no problem with that kind of marriage

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