Hey Egyptians which would u prefer to marry a traditional marriage or with love or meshfar2a ma3ak?

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Far Away ( Still Lost)

I married my girl friend for 5 years now & I've been in love with her for the last 10 years .
I say Marry the one that both of you are in love , cause life aint easy & u'll need love to help you go on.

Rabenna yesa7elek fe elnateega.

msafwat

There are two types of love... Romantic love, which is a chemical proces in the brain producing Dopamine and other substances that make us feel "High" and happy... it is a trick our genes play us to ensure survival of the species and attraction between the opposite sexes. But according to the best scientific theories this process can last any where between a month and three years for any two individuals. So don't expect a marriage based on this alone to be a successful one for more than the maximum three years. I call it love of the heart

On the other hand love based on other factors, like compatibility, understanding, similar standards etc... Is the love that lasts... But unfortunately it needs time to grow and it grows with time... it is not as sudden and deep as the romantic love... Its more like our love to our family (Parents, Brothers and Sisters and Relatives)... Lets call this, love of the brain.

So the best scenario is to have this romantic love to jump start the relation and have all the elements for the brain love present so that when the romantic love starts to disappear the other type kicks in and keeps growing to preserve the relationship.

Second best will be to have an arranged marriage with the elements for brain love present... The relationship might head to a wrong start but with time it will get back on track and end up like the scenario No. One.

Third Best is to have just the romantic love... with some luck your brain will keep producing Dopamine for the maximum three years through which you'll be happy... But then I'm afraid failure is the known fate.

Fourth and last an arranged marriage with neither kinds of love... I guess by now you know what is the result... Hell before... Hell during... and Hell after... stay away from that... it's a disaster.

Wishing you the best with your thanaweya 3ama...

For non Egyptian contributors... Please don't feel offended, I'm sure Gigi dosen't mean to be exclusive... I for myself enjoy very much your contributions in this section as it gives a different and rich perspective... specially that I feel some of you do genuinely love Egypt and Egyptians... So you are welcome in Egypt and most welcome on this section. Its a free country... or at least so I was told ;-)

Edit: Thank you Balsam for your kind words.

Caboria

Many marriages I know based on love turned into hatred. It seems that expectations were high and not realistic. I prefer to start with the traditional way for the introduction and to cover the area of suitability and other considerations that the older people have the experience to give opinion on. Then give enough time even before engagement with the guidance of the families. Then an engagement not less than a year. If love starts and flourishes then go ahead, if not then hard luck. Of course we can not plan and follow our plan at all times, but I am trying to be moderate cause I have seen love chattered on rocks when problems arose.

Adam

WHo says u cant have both? If u marry for the sake of Allah(swt) TRULY, HE will put love between you. If you are muslim you Have to beleive this as its in the Holy Qu'ran. That of course doesnt mean i believe that ANYone should be forced to marry someone as that is Not islam. But before I married my wife (Egyptian) we only had some brief conversations, we were never alone, I asked her parents etc etc....so of course we werent "in love" being in love before marrage is a dangerous thing. It leads only to heartbreak if u cant marry that person for some reason...it also spoils u for when u do marry as your heart isint totally the persons you marry....need i go on? Go with the religion and insha'Allah u cant go wrong.

The Ministry of Common Sense

Love

Alex

I know this is the Egyptian section Gigi but varying nationalities partake! Could you please translate then maybe you will get more replies!...... Thank you.
ADDITION:
Thank you Wise Heart for the translation!!
Gigi good luck with your results!!

Thank you also to Msafwat for your contribution, much appreciated.... I read your answer(as i do everybodies) with great interest, i give u a well deserved thumbs up...if i were asking this question you would most certainly receive 10 Points!!

Ismaily Rules

2 traditional, 3 with love and 1 with lots of Ketchup.

ABANDONED

i want to marry with LOVE because i know if i dont love him i wont really be into the marriage and i will give him a hard time

Kassandra

Again, only for Egyptians! Waaaaaaa! I feel soooo unwelcome....Lol! But I'll pray for you still ;-)

Sultan Shalfat the Adventurer

A man should love and respect his wife even if it was traditional marriage and vice versa.

Thhrough my life experience, a man (or woman) should get married when they find the right person, Traditional or any other way, doesn't really matter as long as they respect the relationship once got married.

Psycho

Traditional insha'Allah, it's feels sweet when the couple get to know each other during Marriage...

usama10173

I prefer to marry with love .
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iman(mooney )is brincizza

!with love!...
but it would be nice if the women could actually choose.. but some peoples father dont let them choose ... sometimes the guy will ask your father but.. if you do not like him the good part is you can say NO... although that it like kinda mean but were not forced in this kinda way.. we choose.. but that how it is.. i would like to do love... but HOPEFULLY.. insha'Allah.. it'll be some one who i know thats how i would like it to be :]

Balsam

I like the answer of msafwat the best. His mind is very well organized. Caboria did a good job too.

hasafer

May Allah protect you , bless you and show the way to happiness in this life and the next one .

A : love for sure , that's why I think I won't marry .

Wise Heart

Princess : at the end of her question she means "or you don't care?"
the rest she says " what do you think of my new change, pray for me because the secondary school result is next Tuesday"

inshaallah you'll pass GiGi

sorry I have no answer I just wanted to translate

lord-k

i only hope that i can get married in those black and white days :(

saso

as a start i'd like to tell u that u r sooooooooooooo young to think about those stuff now
because u r in that stage of ur life that everything is mixed up and confused
and personally i think u should focus in ur career and going to college and sucess in it
and then love or marriage will come at it's right time
and i want to realize that either love or marriage has it's own advantage and disadvantage
contact me and i will be more than happy to explain to u

Donna

English please madam

Sailor

i prefer to marry traditional marriage ,i think that love will come after marry ,you know you will know the other person after the marriage because before the marriage every body will try to do his best to prove that he is the best one you will ever meet .
i hope that you and me success .
good luck to all.

Nony

OK I agree with Adam & Shalfat.
I think if you married with Islam condition Allah will put love in your heart & we all know many love stories end after marriege & many cases of traditional marriage succeded & you can't imagin that they didn't love them before marriage, so it's all about condtions you put it to yourself to choose your partner.
Finally good luck in your result.

mesho f

beltawfik insha2llah
with regards to ur question, the traditional marriage is More stable more longer create a good life for both of the two side
the love come after marriage is real 100%

R A

Ha Ha Ha Egyptians or Arabs marry the one that they love Ha ha ha!!!!I lived there. They can think this but in the end will marry the one that they have the dowery to afford and whose parents approve of you.
Marriages there are arranged. No dating unless you are engaged first. SO primitve!

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