How much does it bother you when you accidentally say something rude to someone?

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Mike's Girl

I'd say No. 2 In the first place, my being rude was accidental so my apologies should be short, sweet and heart-felt. That said, am ready to forget the incident. Profuse apologies make one look so guilty and insincere even. The other extreme makes one inconsiderate and callous.

Lola

a lot but i have to give that person a hug til he/she says i'm forgiven coz i can't sleep thinking that i've hurt someone's feelings. but i don't go buying them a gift for they might consider that a bribe for you to forgive them. just a sincere apology will do.

Georgina

A lot but not enough to buy them anything. I will apologize (not profusely either) and explain that I had realized after the fact that I had been rude though that might've not been my intention and that if they had found it offensive, I ask for their pardon. Something like:

"Marie, come to think of it I think I was rude when you told me about - this morning. I just want to say I am sorry and if you were offended to please forgive me. I was having a bad morning and you caught me in a bad mood which is no excuse"

windblown

It's somewhere between Numbers 1 and 2. If you 'realized' that you said something rude accidentally to someone, you must apologise. It does not matter if its my love ones or total strangers. I cannot tell to myself that the people in the receiving end of the rude remark are just sensitive. Does it mean that the person who gave the remark has the right to be rude? This might be deceiving because the person giving the rude remark will always see himself/herself as an upright person and other is always just sensitive.

We have different cultures. Westerners will usually say things straight while Filipinos will choose the right words so as not to offend anybody. It doesn't mean Westerners are rude but they are usually frank without the intention of hurting ones feelings. In my workplace (another country) with different nationalities, we usually say sorry if we offend them by saying or doing something that is against their culture. It does not mean we are not embracing the culture of the country but its like we have different upbringings, egos and attitudes. That's why we hold each other in high esteem. We respect and value each other so much. Maybe this is the key factor. Just maybe.

Big P

People are different. Everyone is not the same.
For example, Sometimes my tone of voice may sound rude to some people at times when it really was not intended to be rude within my heart. My voice just sound that way sometimes.
I am glad my wife understand me very well. She knows that I don't mean any harm.

I don't need to apologize profusely to no one.
All I need to do is clarify the situation with a spirit gentleness and apologize. That's it.
If the person don't want to accept my apologies,then they become the problem because I already acted respectfully.

cjm

1 - a lot - but I don't apologize profusely or buy gifts or pray they forgive me. I apologize (but usually I can't, because I've been rude to a stranger, then I forgive myself)

i go loony

A lot... Not saying sorry would even cause some sleepless nights.

battgirl

A lot but i don't apologize profusely. Instead I feel like I'm an idiot then i say sorry SINCERELY and get over it. and hope that the person understands that i don't mean it and gets over it as well.

Inday

For someone very, very special - got to be No. 1.
For every one else - No. 2 ought to do it.

jan-na~â™¥~ and im luvin it

it does bother but i think it depends on how much that person means to you.
i say sorry and feel bad about it. and try to be nicer or show them that i regretted what i said

allan y

it would bother me a lot and could not go to sleep until i can apologize and say sorry. the reason why i have to settle disagreements before night falls or i become insomniac.

aznbabyangel17

Yes,It will definitely bother me if I dont do anything to resolve the issue...

The first thing I would do is tell them how sorry i feel for letting myself be unconscious like that and ask for their apology...
Then I will pray for them.Ask God to open their hearts to forgive me and for me not to commit the same mistake again...
I would also give the person time and space to heal and learn from the damage that I have caused.
I would also give myself time to think and learn from what i have done and the hurt that i have caused to someone...

Buying them gifts shouldnt hurt but not for the purpose to buy a persons affection or for it to replace the damage that has been done...No.

And if all of the above was done and the person still holds a grudge against me...
There is nothing I can do but still pray for that person and I will not lose sleep about it since it was an accident,apologized,prayed and waited for...

Good luck!

Jumpin' in the Dark

1 I AM BOTHERED FOR DAYS MAYBE LONGER.

tisya

somewhat..i say im sorry and and as long as i dont mean what i said i get over it.

Well

3. ...and the recipient should not ever take it so seriously. Nothing said here will/should ever result in a lost marriage, job, real-life reputation and self-esteem.

It's easier to do for me and other Americans here I guess because most of us grew up in a very diverse society, exposed to all sorts of races, creeds, religions and politics. That environment develops a strong tolerance for people's differences and becomes a naturally learned skill.

Highly recommended by the way.

avenus

It bothers me more not having said anything. I'm a believer in getting things out in the open. I have regrets over not having said anything.
I am not a rude person so if I say something rude to someone I really mean it (accidental or otherwise).

BokBok

It bothers me a lot and I feel really bad about it. So I have to ask for forgiveness not just for that person but to God as well. So I would tell them Pasensya ka na and I hope they would accept my apology.

But it all depends on how you define rude. If it's kind of jokingly rude.. probably number 2. But if it's the kind of rudeness when you are a bit angry, then I would go for number 1.
I would not buy them a gift, but maybe give them a hug.

Ikaw.. what are your thoughts?

stepss1

binibining pilipina

It depends on my situation:

It bothers me when i offend the person that i care about.

It somewhat bother me sometimes when i don't know the person i'll say sorry and get over it.

and well is right,Americans is a lot different than other people, i'm a hothead but i know when to ground myself and not be bother at all, especially when you're here in US there's a lot of rude people here and chips on their shoulder.

So i'll learned to deal with it. especially with my patients..goodnight!! sometimes i just want to give them anesthesia that won't wake them anymore, but i'm a professional.

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