east2west
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get some collateral from her thats worth that much.If not you can talk to a lawyer with her. |
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kmz1256
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That's a lot of money, I wouldn't, loaning money to anyone changes everything. If you do, be prepared to be stressed out and perhaps out of your money.... |
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sapphire
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I dun believe in money & friendship should not cross. Everybody got their up & downs. Somewhere down the road, you will need help too. Nobody, but only people who are close to you will help u. Since u wanted to help him (u said it), whether out of good will or cos u guys are great pal, it will still be wise to get it down in black & white.
U should also take his past references into considerations, if he is a trustworthly & creditable person, a man of his words, and u have no problem getting back your previous loan (if any), then it should fine.
And ideally u should loan what is comfortable to u, and wat u can do without, in the event of him not paying back.
Police are useless, even with a black & white, they couldnt do anything. what u can do is take up a civil case against him thru a lawyer. If its a matter of principle and u dun mind risking the friendship, pls do take him to court. If not, it aint wise to take a civil case over a mere thousands bucks.
All dun even think about small claim, they dun do personal loans. Only civil court (or mafia) can help in this instances.
So do help him ONLY if u can risk not having the money back and cos u sincerely wanted to help. |
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franciskwhung
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Always only lend the amount of money you can afford not to get back. If s/he pays back, s/he is truly a trusted friend.
If s/he does not pay back for whatever reason, you did your
part for being a friend, but you do not need to lend anymore,
(you have every rights to say no after the first time). If you lend more than you can afford, you risk losing your money and your friendship. |
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erlish
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If you need to spend money to recover the loan (interest-free?) it's better not to make the loan. This being a private agreement (verbal or documented) the police has nothing to do with it.
Even if you have the court's judgement, enforcement is difficult when the borrower is incapable of paying up.
If the person is not gainfully employed, don't make the loan. Unless of course you can afford it. Meaning: the loan amount does not make much difference to making your ends meet monthly. Are you in that kind of position? |
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ENERGISER
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If you can spare the money to lend to a friend, give it to he/she and dont expect it back. If in fact it is a great deal of money that you do want back. Have a contract made up of the amount, date, and any special cercumstances that may be attatched to the situation. |
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Nanny
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I have learned from past experinces that it is always best to put it on paper. You should have two copies one for the both of you with both signatures. You should also put a resonable time frame that you expect your money to be paid back. And if he/she is your true friend and plans to pay you back they won't have a problem with it. Then if any problems you can always take it to small claims court and with this document u would have no problem proven your case. |
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?
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Get all the details in writing, have the paper notarized. |
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Nghiem E
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(1) NEVER give money in a greater amount that would hurt you if you never saw again. You will hurt yourself, your friend, and your friendship. No amount of money is worth the pain and suffering that causes. Either give freely or not at all.
(2) If your friend has a possession, such as a new car (not used) or a $5000 diamond ring that you have evaluated in advance by a professional yourself, that if you sold it you could get all or more of the money back without risk, then buy it and document a legal agreement in writing, of your ownership before lending the money, and that if the money is not paid back in full by a certain date, you will sell it and keep the difference. Jewelry has to be professionally evaluated, as with used cars that are not able to sell at appraised value. You may get stuck donating it to charity and writing the value off your itemized taxes, but only a percentage is deductible.
(3) Note: I would only recommend using collateral on smaller loans. For a "few thousand" I would not recommend a loan at all. The only exception is if you are "investing" in a business venture where you can afford to throw away the money if it fails to pay off, and will not have hard feelings about it.
(4) Again, if you will regret it, if you have conditions or fears, then DON'T. Your friend can borrow from a bank or credit card. If your friend is in such trouble to ask you for a "few thousand" then garnishing wages is not reliable. What is your friend trying to pay for beyond current means? That should also give you a big clue this is not a good idea!
Anyone who is reliable and credit worthy enough to lend that money, could get it elsewhere instead of from you. You are not a bank. Do not lend it unless you can flush the money down the toilet and not care or regret it. Only for good causes, where you do it for the sake of giving, it is worth to give the money away. If your condition is to be paid back, then forget it. Even with business and law, that is no guarantee! |
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Tan D
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I was with a credit collection agency. Friendly loan is the most difficult debt to recover. As there is no black and write, and there are alway dispute over the amount even the person willing to pay.
A lot of people may find it weird to ask a friend to sign an IOU for friendly loan, you should make clear with him that you don't want money to affect your relationship with him, thus it's better to put into black and white. I don't think there is a need to hire a lawyer for few thousands loan.
Alternately if you don't want to put it into black and white, ask the person to issue you with posted dated cheques on the day where the person think he is able to pay you back. |
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Erica J
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First rule of thumb...don't lend money to friends. Because this person is a friend they may think that it's okay to pay you back a little here and a little there. With a bank or other loan company it is a contract that can effect credit so therefore a person takes the loan more seriously. When a friend borrows from a friend there is no feeling of urgency to pay it back because the person is a friend and "they'll understand". If this person is in a situation where they need to borrow the money in the first place then what is that saying? First, they don't have the money to begin with hence the need to borrow. Two, if they don't have it now then why would you think they'll have it two weeks or months from now? I absolutely understand the fact that you want to help your friend out but I say it's a bad idea. Many people have lost friends over situations like this. Now, if you have already decided to lend the money and there is no talking you out of it then you should definitely draw up some sort of contract and have it notorized just in case you have trouble getting the money back. Make sure that in the document everything is spelled out for your friend. Come up with either a date that all of the money needs to be repaid by and/or a payment schedule. Whatever you decide...good luck!!! |
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karma
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how can you have a friendship without trust? |
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anderson
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in this case, you must know your friend very well for this. usually for me if i know my friend will pay me back then i ll borrow him/her. if he is the tricky type, i ll play tricky by not lending him/ her money.
friend is all base on trust, no need lawyer or black or white. |
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whitney
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I always follow the line, never loan out money you can't do without because you NEVER know if you'll get it back. Just to be on the safe side have him sign a document saying that he is going to pay you back. If worse comes to worse you can use that in court. If you don't feel comfortable having him sign something and you do it on good faith - then if you have the extra thousand to spare and its not going to hurt your budget then fine, otherwise don't give it to him. |
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Vince
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tell him : "no f ing way man, you're a really good friend of mine, but i just can't give you that much money. if i have to loan you that much money in the first place, how do i know you're gonna pay me back?" |
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Vindicatedfather
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Every time I've lent money to a friend, I've been burned.. Its not worth it..
You have to say no... or if you do lend him the money.. have no expectations of ever getting it back.. and be okay with that if you can.
I once lent my cousin 1000 to get to Alaska to start a new life. It was the best 1000 i ever lent. He is out of my life, I know that sounds cruel, but he is a mess and took too much away from my life and my families when he was here. He's back in town, but avoids me now because he owes me money. I lent my roomate 500 and she forgot about it.. When we had a fight it came up and she said she would pay me backk.. never happened.. I've written it off and learned a lesson from this.. It was an expensive lesson, but I won't forget it.. Do Not Lend Money to Friends if you want them to continue to be your friends....
Its not worth lending friends money..... |
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ANDERSON P
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I think the bear had given you a very good advice. I dont think it will worth the time and $ for you to draw up contract or engage a lawyer especially if you are in Malaysia. |
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Jeanne B
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I wish I could remember the full Shakespearean quote, but the rest of it essentially said, if you loan money, you'll lose your friendship. I've seen that happen too often. If you want the best advice, go to suzeorman.com. She is THE financial guru!
I say, if you don't already know, the answer is no. If he can't get a loan from a bank or credit union, he isn't the one to loan money to. It hurts to say no, it hurts more when your friend can't or doesn't pay you responsibly, or not at all. |
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aUDREy TTT
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My personal experience tells me NO.. DUN LOAN IT TO YOUR FRIEND!!!
I have made the borrower sign a 'note' that even indicates the instalment payment. Everything was OK initially with payment coming back on time but after 4 months, things did not work out as it was supposed to be. Countless calls, sweet talks did not work...
Human beings are after all human beings.. When they needed something to tight them thru a situation, they tend to promise everything. But once the situation is over, but they find that they are not able to repay as promised, a new situation arises. You as a lender cannot even raise your voice when you call them. You as a lender got to sweet talk and endure whatever they say in order to get your money back.
Take my advice... If you have a heart to lend, dun think about the 'contract'. Give it to him.. yes, i said GIVE. At least you know that you dun have to keep chasing for the money to be returned to you and at least if your friend returns partial to you, you take it as a bonus...
Think about it seriously. You dun make few thousand bucks daily. |
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Chaz M A
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well if you are already afraid that your friend is going to run out on the money then i would suggest that you shouldn't loan him anything. usually it seems that people are surprised when their friends do not pay! you both should sign a piece of paper with the amount owed and the repayment terms. at least you can take him to court if he does not pay. i would guess that he is coming to you because of his/her credit or something. that should tell you a lot. people promise the moon when they want something. |
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tonalc1
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I'll just pile on to what people are saying here: money matters between friends can be disastrous, both financially and to the friendship.
If you're going to do it, put it in writing and have it notarized. Be willing to sue your friend. |
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skcs11
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dont loan it |
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Joe
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It is not worth losing a friend over money.
Don't hire a lawyer.
And don't loan your friend any more than you can afford to lose. |
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redhighheelsneakers_
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Borrowing from or loaning to a friend is a risk that goes beyond losing your money. Write up an agreement with a specific date for repayment. Have the friend sign it and date it.
But...be prepared to lose the money - or the friend - if problems of any kind prevent the friend from repaying the loan. If you can afford to lose a few thousand dollars, its very kind of you to help out.
As for the police helping you get the money back, its not a criminal offense but a civil offense and you would have to take it to small claims court. |
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Lyzette N
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Make a contract type it up get them to sign and a friend or two. If they don't take them to small claims court (depending on the amount of course). |
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Nolagirl83
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Would you be willing to bring your friend to court?? And if you do and if your friend is made to pay it back then could they? I mean if they have to borrow the money then I doubt they could really pay it back at least not very quickly.
I was in a similiar situation with a friend we (me and my fiance) let them borrow $2500 cuz their truck needed a new engine and we couldnt just let them end up with no car and 2 kids. they paid maybe $300 back and we were getting upset at the fact that they would 'waste' what little money that they did have instead of making more of an effort to pay us back. So we finally told them dont worry about it, that they could just keep it because it wouldve just caused problems in our friendship in the long run with us trying to get the money back.
Also in the beginning when we let them borrow it we knew it would take a very long time for them to pay it back if they would even be able to pay it all back. We even had an agreement written up just in case but when it comes to friends or family you gotta think of it more like a gift instead of a loan, unless you are willing to risk the friendship.
Oh and if you are willing to risk the friendship then get a lawyer if it comes to that. Also have whatever agreement on paper and have it notarized. |
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Sunshine!
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never loan anything you're gonna want back. it will put a strain on your relationship. |
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Roger N
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Never "loan" money that you can't live without.
Intentions are great but intentions don't put the money back in your account.
If he has gotten to the point of not having any money, what makes you think that he's going to have it later to pay you back.
My recommendation: Don't do it. He's a big boy and he'll take care of himself. He has to learn to do it on his own. |
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herman m
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Get something they value as collateral and get a contract, don't just hand over the money, I've lost a lot of friends by lending.( and money because they didn't pay back and I had to sue ) |
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♫♥TheBear♥♫
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Tens? its ok... Hundreds? 'fine'... but by the thousands, I really suggest you do some serious thinking on this, man.
First of all, a 'best friend' could mean nothing more when money is being involved... a best friend is whom most people lose their money too...
I don't want to make any comments which could discourage you on this. He/she is your friend and you should be able to evaluate his/her personal outcome on this. Try working out on a scheme on repayment.
MOST people tend to run away because of not being able to fulfill their repayment on time or so. Some are not even able to repay at the amount promised...
Personally, I'd say, discuss this with reason. Don't go by 'best friend' reason when it comes to money issues... best friends are just an excuse for most people to tap into our pockets... |
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flora_pr48
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I've always believed that business (any kind)between friends, which involve money do not end well, and usually the friendship goes to an end. Maybe I'm mistaken but if you are going to give it a chance I highly recommend that you two talk about it, make all points and conditions clear and put it in writing (do some kind of contract specifying all the terms, specially the time in which money should be paid back to you). Good luck. |
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