My wife is a Filipina so would this also apply to her?

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shirley g

My friend had the same problem.

INSTALLING HUSBAND 1.0

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly in Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0, NBA 3.0. and Golf Clubs 4.1. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no
avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, Husband 1.0 is an Operating System. Please enter the command: "http:// I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0
should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the
background, that will eventually seize control of all your system resources).

Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend
Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

afreeman20035252

Philipina women tend to be like the way your describing. They are also very loving, loyal, fun, make great mothers to your children, and make outstanding lovers. So before you decide to swap out your software, think about all the good things Philipina women are!

BlackHat

DON'T FORGET:

- To apply PATCH regularly for security reason.
- To SCAN weekly for Trojans

ignorancegawdess

haha. yeah

bitoy

yes i got this email before too but it still made me laugh today

BONJOUR

this has been the most creative and entertaining thing to read. if u did this yourself, GOOD JOB BUdDY!!!! i liked the jewellery 5.0 LOL

starryeyed75

Too funny!!

Explorer

my advice is to run 2 systems simultaneously.
Add Girlfriend 2.0 as a fail safe alternate when wife 1.0 is acting up

ausblue

lol yeap haha :)

spiceychickensandwich

you can un-install wife 1.0 but its very costly and almost always causes severe disk thrashing....roflmao

still

This piece of "funny" article has been going round on the internet for years..I have read this a few years back but then, you might be the original author.

Leander

That's so entertaining and funny. Thanks

kuanas

THUMPS UP to Shirlyg and a star for PAPA CHUCK!!

love the 2!!

Juan C

LOL!!! very witty, interesting, and funny!!!!

_smile_'s Kometa of Biga-a

LOL! Very entertaining and true! Cheers!

mackie

very entertaining..

annabelle p

Very interesting. Programming wife has advanced technologically from the obsolete robotic system. No push buttons needed, only a click will do.

Warren D

I would think it would apply to her but you need to get the manual in Tagalog just to be certain.

Very funny.

Bitter Guy

lol. nice one ... thanks for sharing.

Purple Tactics

The best one you've ever posted Chuck!

BluElla

Before installing either Boyfriend 5.0 or Husband 1.0, try to run Spyware 8.1 to eliminate the the irritating popup Jealous 1.2.. lol

Luke.

LOL!
Get a divorce =D

SilverHeart

That's funny as heck.

gmanfaraway

Just install girlfriend 5.0 on another machine. I put mine on my laptop, works great.

agua dulce

Yes yes yes...Wife 1.0 is the best program there is (more so because it applies to most Filipina wives). Girlfriend 5.0, inspite of its popularity, is just a fad and will, sooner or later, create problems to your system. Do not purchase. It's not worth it.

Ë—sd2

Well Ron Artest pulled Paul Peirces shorts down while defending him.

Shaq was known as backboard tester cause he broke backboards.

Rasheed Wallace got a technical foul for looking at a ref.

Shienaran

As someone above posted, you could always install another back up G1rlfriend 2.0 program into your laptop. Just make sure your Wife 1.0 program doesn't detect it or it will initiate support programs like Screams 1.0, Hysterics 1.5, DishThrow 2.0 or worse, the dreaded LorennaBobbit 5.0 and your whole system could experience constant crashes, boot up failure and possible power plug malfunction. Also, if you are not careful and do not use protection programs like Trojan 1.0 or Trust 1.5, your back up G1rlfriend 2.0 program might become contaminated with a replication virus and produce an illegal pirated copy of your original Junior 2.0 program. This will automatically upgrade your G1lfriend 2.0 into a M1stress 2.0 program which require constant costly maintenance. I don't have to tell you what a big headache this can be both financially and emotionally, so install back up G1rlfriend 2.0 programs at your own risk : P

Aref H4

Thank you, Papa Chuck, for these valuable info on computer upgrades and glitches. Learned a lot from this and the other answerers' postings.

However, all these new softwares would pale in comparison to the O/S specifically designed for this locality where Grouch is coming from. Harem 9.0. Beats everything.

HeeeehawwwwwwW!!!

Chris

Ha ha. For all you ladies out there shaking your heads and you guys laughing too, here is a letter my wife wrote to tech support I found in her email last week:

Subject: Service guide for husbands

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

Desperate

--------------------------------------...

Dear Desperate:

Keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command: C:>I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications: Guilty 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, Happyhour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create "snoring loudly" wave files.

DO NOT install MotherInLaw 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance. I personally recommend HotFood 3.0 and Lingerie 5.3.

TabzWfy

are there any softwares to support programs of Girlfriend 5.0 or Wife 1.0
-Spoil 9.9
-Comfort 6.0
-Hug 3.2
-Massage 4.0
-Sex 6.9

---This was amusing to read! Thanks for sharing!!!

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