What would you do if you find out?

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justjan

Unless you were dating her, I think the real issue is whether or not the core of the person has altered.

Your connection has to be very close for her to confide in you.

You should see it as an immense compliment she would tell you. She is well aware your friendship is on the line.

Be a real friend and accept her for who she is. Friendships build in their intensity and meaning when we take on the things we might not like so much as well as the good.

That is what a real friend is. If you cannot accept her, then you have no future with her.

lanecx

i dont mind. thats what she wants. i will still be her friend. much better so that she will not be depending on my gentlemanly manner. i treat lesbians like men. not women.

Felicity???

It happened to me before when my trusted friend confided about her relationship with a lesbian and she's in love with her..I was shocked at first but for me it's no big deal.. what is important is that she's being true with herself and she's happy with it. That time she was still on the healing process from a failed relationship with her ex (a male) and that lesbian might be so good to her that she thought that it's better to be with a lesbian who is a true and loving person than her ex who cheated on her for a lot of times. I guess she was just confused that time and craving for love and affection. Anyways, for me..she's really a true and good friend. She's a very soft hearted person and ever ready to help her friends and family at all times. So I have no rights to condemned her just for such things. I just told her that I'm happy for her and try to encourage her to continue aiming for goals in life. <*-*>

annabanana

I guess a lot would depend on how long you have known each other/been friends. I would express to her that it hurt your feelings that she didn't feel comfortable enough to confide in you earlier and ask her why? Be honest with yourself and ask yourself if you have similar feelings for her maybe? Accept her as she is. I would remain her friend and be supportive of her sexual preference because, as you know, it was probably very difficult for her to let something like this be known. Best wishes! Anna

freeverse

Well as long as it doesn't affect our friendship,she will still remain my friend.

-have a lesbian friend they are loyal-

chad w

so what the is her personal bussiness she wasnt hurting u or doing anything bad to u she just needed time to tell u she would still be my friend

mr.boredguy

I don't see the problem... it's not like she betrayed you, or lied to you, or hurt you. She's just getting closer & building more trust in the relationship with you by telling you that, and trusting you with that information.

Rhonna T.

there's no problem with that. Maybe at first, she is not yet comfortable telling you and still scared of being rejected and misunderstood. you should be thankful that finally, she has opened up to you and decided to make you really part of her world. Treasure it and support her.

Kojak

You seem to imply that she has in some way "violated" your trust........maybe the reason she did not tell you is because she was afraid to ruin a friendship she valued

Have some empathy and compassion......this is very difficult for her.....it took a lot of courage for her to reveal her situation to you....... and according to the latest scientific indicators.....it is NOT a free will choice on her part ......it is genetic.....

I am not gay but I have several good friends who are..... as long as you respect each other it should not effect the friendship

annabelle p

Shock will be a mild word to describe my reaction. Disgust...no, much too strong for that either. Well, if I am a true friend to her, no matter what her gender preferences are, I have no business condemning her for being what she is. A little understanding helps at a time when our friendship is at stake for it will hurt me to know she has been keeping this little secret from me. I'll give her enough time to tell me everything and hope that our friendship won't end with her confession.

alan

i'm a man. i would be asking him (since she fells like she is he) why you did not tell me? what if i did court you. dihins pala tayo talo eh. she will still be my friend whom i trusted before until now and tomorrow. i will accept her with open arms. a close confidante she can be.

windblown

Give her time to explain why it took so long for her to confess. You will be in the best position to analyze her explanations and it would be up to you if you will still consider her as a friend.

Cheers.

possum_chops13

I think I'd probably be a bit upset at first that she didn't trust me earlier with that information. But then I'd realise that she has placed a great deal of trust in me by telling me now. Are you upset that she's dating women? Or just that she didn't confide in you?
Maybe she wasn't ready to tell people yet. Maybe she was scared that she'd be judged or lose your friendship. At the end of the day though, it's her life, and she isn't obligated to tell you anything.

ticklememay0

well maybe if she hasn't told me for so long, she may have thought that i wouldn't accept her anymore because i am not a lesbian. but i would not say "we can't be friends anymore!" i may feel a little awkward around her for a while, but i'm sure our friendship would not change. well wait... i might not want to have sleepovers anymore. lol. but that's about it!

*WINK*

What is there to do? How does it affect me? I don't care. If it we are still the same people, I will still love her the same. Nothing has changed. Thats how love is. You love 'just because' and nothing can stop it if it is real.

Bitter Guy

Seriously, I would be extremely turned on by the thought of her with other ladies.

Happy Man

I'll trust her more for being honest with me. What are friends for if I don't understand her feelings and situations.

just thinking

nothing,that's life.

siopaO

it would hurt, but i'll understand her..

pero_102

a lesbian or a homosexual for a long time friend i have trusted in what way? if financial, it's not the person i look at but how well they perform. But if they are doing immoral issues, esp sexual, i would take it an offense for the organization and have it grounds for their dismissal. Be they be my friends or relatives. There is a protocol to be followed. However they may not be confirming with my decision, they would still be my dear friends or relatives.
Although my trust for them in our relationship should not be beyond moral standard, i would not also like to discover that they would continue their lifestyle to other person or else........I am suppose to be their friend,not one to tolerate their "perverted" ways that could lead to their destruction.

Batman's Queen

If my best friend does what your best friend did to you, nothing will change..Though, I would be very surprised at her revelation but it wouldn't change anything. She does not owe her life to you, nor she is answerable for her actions, so there's no need for her to apologize. But if she is my sister, daughter, my mother or someone closely related to me, then that is another matter.

Anathema Device

I would let her know that I accept her for who she is and that I would continue to be there for her.

I wouldn't be offended or hurt by her not telling me that she's a lesbian because sometimes people don't disclose such choices not because they don't trust their friend (or family member) but because they are still not ready to fully accept themselves as gay. The process of realization and accepting oneself as gay/lesbian takes some time and disclosure especially to friends or family members is the last stage of such a process.

Juan C

I think she is getting closer with you and that the trust she has on you is building up more... I think you should just accept the truth, and just support her -- if you're a real friend, that is...

polrox

very simple..
(on my point of view, im a man, here's what ill do if my friends confessed (can be applied to a gay friend))

ill look at her in the eye, then wait for her to explain, cause the main reason she confessed is because she's ready to tell it to me now and im sure she has reasons to back her up, and by confessing means she's going to tell you the truth (otherwise she'd be keepin' the secret forever), well that's it, whatever i will do next will depend on her answer but still, ill give her credit and respect and will stay as her friend and just accept her chosen 'path', of course at first, i might fell uncomfortable, but i know ill get used to it, hope this will help

*starred

monkey spankin'

so? maybe she was not ready to tell anyone yet. if you were a true friend ,you would accept that.

blue gardenia

surprised maybe shocked but only for a brief moment. after it has sinked it, back to normal again. no big deal. she is what she is. and will always be my dear friend.

jan-na~â™¥~ and im luvin it

i have lesbian friends.. so it's ok..that's how she is.. and i'll accept it..

btw, im a lesbian.. LOL

dinski_99

Well it all depends. If you are asking me as a boy, there is no problem with it. Since now a days its ok whatever your friends gender is meaning you don't judge them, only if kinda like her then i might be frustrated a little. Other than that I wont do anything be a better friend I guess. If I am a girl then it also depends For me I don't have issues with lesbian or problems with my friends dating girls. So again I won't do anything. If I am a person with issues with lesbian then I guess I will just have to be distant with her. that's all folks.

philosophical beaver

i'd just try to understand her. it must have been difficult for her to tell you before, not knowing if you will accept her or not, that is why it took so long for her to do so. tell her you felt hurt because she didnt trust you with her secret. but assure her that her sexual orientation is not a hindrance to your friendship.

johnny h

what wrong w/ that?

she's only a person like us,she has likes and dislikes

jeff_kotzen9354

well for me is honesty is the key of keeping your relationship.so it is alright that she confessed it to you. But this lesbians we dont know what they really want or its just an act of expressing something. I got the same situation before what i did is i told her the word of god that being lesbian is not acceptable in the law of god. some society can accept it you should wake her up maybe shes not aware of this. If you wanna change her life..

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