Why do women say that they should be able to dress as they please without being raped?

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Dragonfly

If you leave your house unlocked, it doesn't make it okay for a burglar to rob your house. It might increase your risk of being robbed but it doesn't mean that you deserve it or 'asked' for it. The burglar would still be found guilty in a court of law and would not be able to cite the fact that the house was unlocked in his defence.

Likewise, it is never okay to rape a woman (or indeed anyone), regardless of what they wear. Everyone has the right to wear what they want (as long as it's in keeping with the law) and everyone has the right not to be beaten up or raped. The two have nothing to do with each other. You speak of logic but it's no more logical to say that it's okay to rape a woman who wears a short skirt than it is to say it's okay to punch a man in the nose for wearing the colour green.

Of course, it's sensible to lock your doors but it's a far stretch from that to saying that you asked to be robbed. In many small towns people *don't* lock their doors.

Rapists have psychological problems. They don't usually rape women because of overwhelming temptation because of the way she is dressed. They rape her for a whole host of warped reasons, such as wanting to prove his dominance and strength or for the thrill of it. The fact of what she is wearing doesn't come into it until the trial where the defence lawyer will try to use any argument to get his or her client off the hook.

The possible exception is date rape, where the rapist knows the victim. Sometimes this is clear-cut rape, other times the man accused of rape may be confused and have genuinely thought the woman wanted the sex. If she is sexily dressed and flirtatious it can add to the confusion - but if she clearly and loudly states 'NO' then there is no excuse for confusion. If she says no, you have to assume she means no regardless of how she is dressed, otherwise it's rape. In actual fact, the biggest factor in date rape is not clothing but alcohol - there is more source for confusion either at the time of the sex or afterwards if one or both people are drunk.

According to human rights groups such as Amnesty, rape is just as common in countries where women are required to cover up. The official figures understate the problem because the social stigma is so great that most rape in these places goes unreported. In many countries, rape victims can be killed by their own families to try to erase the 'stain' on their family's honour. Is it any wonder they don't tell people what happened if they can help it?

wassie

your real name is'nt Sheikh Taj el-Din al-Hilali is it.

Alchemist

You know I've heard that argument and while I think that women should maybe think about how they dress, they should not have to be afraid that what they wear will "induce" some man to rape them. Women don't buy risque' clothing to not be looked at, but it is their right to wear it and feel safe in doing so. If men can't control themselves, it is their problem not the woman's. If looking at a girl in a bikini makes someone think of rape, then they need some psychiatric help. At the same time if a woman becomes indignant at a man looking at her because of her attire she should ask herself why she wore the outfit in the first place, however she should not have to worry about that man raping her.

photogbob2003

Elizabeth Arden once wrote that it is the birth right of every women to be beautiful and natural. The Greeks believed that beautiful women are the hallmark of every great society. Either you have a lot of growing up to do or you just don't understand. Try living in another culture to increase your insight. Better yet. dress up as a girl for the day and see just how much harassment they put up with.

ascalila

most women who get raped wear normal clothes and the rapist was not a stranger.

gagirl2c

No one, male or female should have to worry that the way he or she dresses will invite someone to rape them. Re-visit the bill of rights, which entitles ALL of us to life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness. Would you think that guys who are raped while incarcerated were also "dressing as they please"?

Jarien

You're confusing the issue with your analogies.

Men can wear what they like, so should women. Our clothing should have no effect on our safety on the street or in everyday life.

Social "norms" have evolved to put women into danger based on their fashion choices. That's something that needs to change. There are plenty of places in the world where one doesn't have to lock one's door, where pickpocketing is unheard of... The point being that things can change, and should, for the better.

Anna D

women wearing "near to nothingness" and "leaving wallets hanging out of your pockets" shouldnt even be named as examples of the issue you want to establish.

in fact your wallet will still be pickpocketed without it being hanging out. there are also cases where women are raped even though they are fully clothed.

women wear what they please and should be able to, is because of the right they have. for instance, a toned woman who likes wearing a spaghetti strapped top- because she feels confident, she likes how her muscles show through such tops- not necessarily because she wishes to entice men or be noticed by others. mind you, there are others who are doing for themselves.

needless to say of course, women who wear skimpy clothes also unknowingly encourage "sick" men who cant control their own urges and feel the need to exercise their power over these women.

these are just some of those things in life.

webby

Anthony, as some have already told you above, there is absolutely no evidence to suggest that what a woman is wearing has any bearing on her being raped.

You need to get into the mind of a rapist to understand that it is his twisted imagination doing the work and nothing based on the reality of what he sees.

cosgirl22

Because these days men are expected not to act like cavemen. Just because someone dresses prettily doesn't mean she's "asking for it' what if there was a rapist that was only attacking people wearing say, Blue. does that mean every man woman and child should stop wearing blue just because it gets some pervert in the mood?

Elizabeth

I do see where you're coming from.
But, in my humble opinion, how a person dresses has no bearing on what these predatory b*st*rds do.

Ernie

I leave my doors unlocked and I don't expect to be robbed. As a matter of fact most thieves actually know that windows are easier to get through than doors!

I have a convertable car and I don't lock the doors because a thief can go in through the top.

Living our lives accoding to the expectations of theives and rapists is nuts!

Sarcasma

Umm women have been known to rape men as well. And it isn't just women who dress in next to nothing that get raped. Don't you expect to wear what you like without being raped? If I leave my wallet hanging outside my pocket, does that mean it is ok to steal it?

No matter what the crime is - it is wrong! Some people just try to blame others for their actions.

curiousgeorgette

I feel your pain, buddy! However actually since I work for therapists who give therapy to sex offenders on parole - I'll have to go with - they break in the house and rape too!!!!!!!!!!!! They don't NEED an excuse (what they're wearing, etc.). However some women DO need to 'get dressed' before they go out to NOT encourage these guys!! Like I said - they don't need it - they do it anyway - why make it easier on them????!!!!!!

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