Are polish mothers and fathers very strict on wanting their children to marry within their own Polish culture?

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chgoalex

I think they might be a little uncomfortable with their offspring marrying someone of a different race, but the most important thing to Polish parents is Catholicism and a stable family structure.

Meaning, Polish parents expect their children to start a family and respect old family values with their children (Sunday church going, get-togethers, respect for elders, Christmas, Easter, etc.)

So exactly - a Jew, Muslim, or anyone of a religion different than Catholicism is not welcome. Another type of Christian such as a Lutheran or Baptist could be ok, as long as he/she converts to the Catholic religion. (Another thing with Jews... elderly Polish people can be anti-semitic for various reasons, especially in select parts of Poland. Therefore, even if a Jew converts to Catholicism, it's a tough situation due to these social reasons.)

As in every culture, Polish people usually want someone they can positively associate with. For example, they'll love the American that took the time to learn a couple of Polish phrases. A "dzieÅ„ dobry" and "dziÄ™kuje" never hurts. (:

saldalia

Not really. Polish people in general are open to mix marriages especially emigrants. But when we are talking about Polish people in Poland they would prefer for their kids to marry Christians....And they are not too happy when daugthers want to get married to middle eastern's who aren t Christians

Konnie M

I'm from the US, and I married my husband in 1981. We had no difficulties from his parents other than the fact that they knew that he would be moving to the United States and they were sad to see him go.

ClassyInCoach

In my experience (while living in Krakow, where standards are different than in the country), the main thing is Catholicism. Not *Christianity*, mind you! -- I was the first Protestant my distant Polish relatives ever met, and they asked if I celebrated Christmas and Easter -- but Catholicism. Roman Catholicism is strongly preferred, but other varieties are cautiously accepted.

Poles are very proud to be "European" and show no reluctance to marry people from other EU countries. Poles are also typically pro-USA (that applies to the American people and the USA as a place to live, but not to the government's policies), so Americans are also accepted if they can demonstrate an appreciation and respect for Polish culture in return. The same applies to Canadians.

Things get trickier when skin color gets involved. The less caucasian you look, the more difficult it will be for you to be accepted. The vast majority of Asians in Krakow wander around in huge tour groups and stop to take pictures every few feet and only eat in the few Chinese restaurants in the city, and so they seem very strange-- like they came all the way to Poland to stare at Polish culture while taking extra precautions to avoid trying it themselves. There aren't many black people at all. So, many Polish people have limited experience with interacting with non-caucasian people in a casual, normal, one-on-one way. However, I think that many of them would be colorblind if their son or daughter was in love.

bookworm1171

Most parents prefer marriage of their "own kind" no matter what country they're from, but if you're a good partner for your foreign spouse than your inlaws shouldn't mind. However religion does play a part in it. Most Poles are Catholic and the ones on the far eastern part of the country are Russian orthodox. I'm Catholic and married my Catholic/Poland-born husband in 1994 and his brother married a Catholic/Poland-born girl, but my inlaws still prefer me over her. :)

discoballz82

this is a question that can never be answered correctly. it's not embedded in the culture as it is in, say, middle-eastern cultures. keep in mind that poland has been interacting with people from other countries since the beginning of history....the russians, germans, french, swedes, etc. in the last century poles have travelled outside their country to work and live all over the world. marriages between people of different ethnic backgrounds and religions happen all the time.
whether or not one's family approves of disapproves of marrying someone who is not polish, catholic, etc. is really a personal belief, and not something dictated by cultural values.

polish people are very proud of their heritage, but at some point you gotta stop being polish and start being a person like everyone else. that's my personal opinion.

The thing is most mother's and father's, doesn't matter what race or nationality will prefer you to marry your "own kind" over anyone else. But then although parents might prefer it many don't actually force you or disown you if you don't. it is prefered just because it keeps the family the same and everyone can understand one another. Marrying another Polish person is usually not forced, but many do so because of how they were raised in a Polish family. They like to stay with that idea and that living style they decide themselves to marry their "own kind" to keep their lives the same. So, overall most parents prefer marriage of their "own kind" but Polish parents are not as strict and don't inforce it as much as others but the children feel great in that living style they decide themselves to stay like that. Hope this helps.

Iro

They are strict if they live in Poland but if they live somewhere outside of the country they can't really do much :)

Great62

Poland is the native of Catholicism, therefore they keep religious traditions as a most part of the national culture. I think, Poland is one of the leader, where mixed marriage is a rare event.

Schmeep

Usually, yes. However, Catholicism is usually more important overall to them. No jews allowed (trust me from experience).

John S

my father came over from Poland when he was 16 and was very pleased when i was a teenager and was dating a girl of Polish descent. he preferred i stay with her but after 2 1/2 years things changed. i wound up marrying a girl that is 1/2 Polish and 1/2 Italian. i guess the 50/50 mix was good enough for him.

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