Help please i have a question?

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Tanju

Dear Jen,

Well, I must answer this question ...
Important Subject ...

Men are always men like girls are always girls ...
Because, Human are always Human ..
Country, it does not matter ...
Can be Turkiye, can be Japan, can be South Africa ..

Important thing is Your Heart, Your thinking, Your instinct ...
Always Check Your Friend, What he says, whats he doing any of subject ..
If you do not like his behaviour, tell him very seriosly,
do not cancel, do not delay ,
just in time you must talk ...

Warn him, speak him, tell him ...

If he says 'Never Mind like that', You must cancel your frind ...
Because, We are Human ...
We can do any mistake , one times, two times, but never three times ... (I am talking same mistake ...)

By the way, In my life, My Wife's Brother is married German Woman, They are so happy and My Cousin is married English Boy ...
This is an example ...

Did you get the Point ?
If it is not clear, please turn back ...

amada

I'd say it depends on the man.
Don't get married before you are sure it's him you want and it's you he wants.
Even than there is no guarantee.
Marriage is a hard business and when there are cultural differences it is harder.
Not all men marry for citizenship.
Those who do, generally tell you their reasons.
But , they may choose not to.
Be sure he's not playing a game before you marry.
My brother lives in France. His wife is French. They lived here a couple of years before moving to France. He is happy that he has 2 citizenships and uses whatever is appropriate for him at any given moment.
Did he marry her to become French?
Absolutely not.

Kendra, this is especially for you because you asked if her bf. was trying to learn her language:

My brother's wife did everything she could , not to learn Turkish, and to prevent her kids from learning it. She learned it anyhow and the kids too, but their knowledge could have been better. Why? Because she was afraid my brother could choose to live in Turkey. To force him, to live in France, she used Turkish being hard as an excuse. I still can't forgive her for that, but still, I love her. Why ? Because my brother is happy and proud of his family.

Josh

I have no clue what makes you think that ALL Turkish men are DIFFERENT than the men in the US? how did you get this idea? is it just because of your Turkish bf? the way he acts and such? so is this your conclusion that he is the ORIGINAL one "a Turkish IDOL" and the rest of the Turkish men are copies so they must act just the way he acts? lol listen I would say hey you are CORRECT if you say Turks are different than Filipinos in terms of the culture and the psychical appearances.Every culture has its own ideas about the proper way to look for a mate, and while most people sort of adapt to the dominant essentially English cultural norms of the mainstream United States,a lot of people are unwilling to do so in the very intimate realms of love and sex. I have found that some seemingly very 'modern' women turn out to have VERY 'old country' ideas when it comes do dating and sex, and often their families try with varying success to IMPOSE them even on people born and raised here.

For example, our 'pair' dating is often unaccepted by many Asian cultures, who only allow group dating if any at all before marriage.

On the other hand there is not much difference between a turk from western part of Turkey and an American from New York (although there are always exceptions)

Furthermore, don't you think that it is not right to carry your relationship issues on here? don't you think that it must remain confidential between you and him? don't you think he would get hurt if he only knew that you've been keep carrying this bf ISSUE on here over and over again? if I were you I swear I wouldn't date with a guy that comes from some other different cultures (as you have stated that he's different)and find myself a Filipino bf rather than asking some weird questions on here.

fanciullo

we are mediterranean. when we love, we love to the bone.. there can be exceptions, but if a turkish guy marries a girl, it means that he really loves her..

arpsy

Well dear you can not generalize, i am married to a Turkish guy and i am foreigner, and i have met several people like me, of course there are exceptions but you have to look by yourself what is the attitud of your boyfriend, first at all he must be respectfull to you and there most be plenty comunication among both of you guys, if you have doubths about him why dont you ask it directliy to him, you have to notice if he is talking to his family about you, if he has introduce you to them, and also to his friends, if he has been interested in meet your familly, if your familly and his family have get in touch, this are important things that will let you know if he is serious about you or not and it is not just because he is Turkish, it is the rule in general for all man from all over the world, more ever if you are living in USA ok? be open with him as much as you are here. Comunication and respect is the most important if something is not going ok you tell him and see what is his answer. Good luck.

kendra h

If you are worried that he is playing you, he probably is. I have learned in the last few years that I really should listen to that nagging voice in the back of my head, because it is right.

I applaud you for going to such lengths to learn about Turkey. I know when you can't go there and visit, it is hard to learn. Believe me, after you spend a short time there, questions that are so hard for you to answer now will come easily. My question to you is, what has HE been doing to learn about you? Has he been trying to learn Tagalog? Has he been asking questions about your culture, people, beliefs, customs, etc? From what I have heard from your questions, it does not seem like it, but I could be wrong. Trust your instincts, they are usually right.

Ais@

Jen it depends on each person, u cant talk about turkish man generally. But thats also true, if a turkish boy has serious plan with a foreigner girl, with time, i mean while the relationship is becoming serious and the couple is starting to plan marriage(and also after the marriage), there will be some expectations, which are easy and natural for a turkish girl, but a foreigner girl can found them hard. For the marriage it would be necessary to convert to Islam, maybe it wont be a part of ur life, but after u can face with difficulties. I mean here the family. Again i cant talk generally, cuz i know turkish families, which could accept a christian girl on their son's side (the girl is already became a Muslim but dont practice it, she is keeping the christian traditions) but others are want to see a turkish girl in the family, and even dating each other, meet too many times or live together before the marriage is not acceptable. We can say as a rule, family is a very important thing in turkish culture, so parent's and also relative's opinion can be decisive. So simply; one thing is to win a turkish boy's heart but after you have to convince his family too :)

By the way, Kendra gave you an interesting answer. I need to mention, if he doesnt try to learn about ur culture, it doesnt mean certainly, that he isnt interested in u. You should accept something, a turkish boy will never be interested in any other culture more than his own. And for you to accept his culture there is one of the most important expectation. I think, you are enough smart to recognise what is his real purpose. Listen to the inner voice is always a good decision. Hope it helps :)

Diane H

it really depends on the person and how they have been brought up, i know some turkish people who are very well cultured. By the way how does he talk to you? you can usually tell how much he cares about you from what he says, like for example does he ask you how your day was, how your family is, and even little things like what did you eat today or what kind of food or music or language do you have in your culture?. When you mention that you are sad or ill does he seem worried or even alittle angry becuase you are not taking care of yourself? and also does he remember every little detail about what you said and what you did that even you dont remember doing or saying util he mentions it? Just little things like this shows that he cares and wants to learn more about you. Also what sort of conversations do you have? is it more to do with each others interests and about eachothers family or is it just about crude and dirty things asthough he just wants to get into your pants(i want to **** you rather then i want to stroke you lovely hair)? these are the kind of questions you have to ask yourself. A genuine guy will not be a pervert to you (very hard for them so thats really saying something lol) and will ask you alot of questons about yourself like what are your hobbies even silly things like what is your favourite colour or what shampoo/perfume do you use. As i said before i know they are just little things but you can realy read between the lines from these little things. So put the whole "if the man is turkish" this behind. He is a man full stop. Its more of a question of whther he like you for being you whether you are foreign or not

good luck x

Trevor Dunham

hi

About marrying because of citizenship depends on your citizenship. Ok, Turkey is not a rich country but it's not poor either. No offense but if you're living in a poor country then probably this is not an option for him.

Second, it's hard for turkish men to accept foreign girls but it's not impossible also. So if he marries you, he will take this seriously for sure because marriage is a far more a holy thing in Turkey then in the western world.

For more info about Turkish Culture please check http://www.turkeyinphotos.com/culture.html

Good luck

Totally Blunt

There are around 20,000 Russian brides only in Antalya.That's, except my friend here who is married for more than ten years and has two lovely daughters. And this number represents only the Russian ones.

If I had to make a generalization, I would say Turkish men are very inclined to marry foreigners. But as we all know, all generalizations are wrong and you have to make your own mind up, because you know him, not us.

DanyBoy

Okay this is to every one yes and no it changes

33 Lashes

if hes trying to rush you into marriage, you know somthing is fishy

Allan D is GAME OVER

I suppose Tanju has said something very accurate...

Vibe

Hi sweetie.. ok Im not Turkish too but I hope to inject my 2 cents here. I am so fully aware of Turkish men's notorious reputation of marrying foreign women for citizenship. They are almost desperate to get out of their country for better opportunities elsewhere.

I know cos I dated a Turkish for 3 years and we started as good friends. He told me loads and I understand alot of Turkish culture from him and his friends.

He, himself wont rule out convenience marriage as he felt trapped in misery in his own country. Hes amazingly smart and capable but isnt given much opportunities in Turkey. This man wants to marry me but cos he s so in love with me and not my citizenship. How do I know? Instincts.

Do believe in your own womanly instincts. It is that powerful sometimes. Cant you tell from how he treats you? You shd be able to.
Trust your heart hun.

Edit: GENERALLY I DON'T think they take foreign women seriously.

KГјrЕџad

i am a Turk. if you muslim no problem for me. most of the Turk think like me.There may be exceptions, of course.

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