No affection from my Russian Fiancee?

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natalie

David,
I'm a Russian girl married to an American. I haven't met him through dating sites. I was in US on a vacation as an exchange student. I think that Russian women who put their info to meet a foreign husband are just trying to leave Russia. It's good that you saw love in her eyes. Russian women are very passionate but it does take time to open them up. Don't you know a common saying that " a Russian soul is a mystery"?
I think
1. she was just trying to move to U.S. and now she's having second thought about leaving her family, friends, possibly a Russian boyfriend
2. It's been taking you too long to tell her how really feel and she wants to know that it's not just physical

P.S. Believe me when my husband and i go out for a romantic diner and all that he can talk about is business and asks me for a kiss at the end of the night he's not going to get it. It has to be romantic.
As for your fiancee saying kisses at the end of every email it's pretty typical to say that even to your friends in Russia.
And yes guys pay for dinner every single time.
I'm not trying to be mean or nice I'm just share with you what I know. I'm pretty sure you didn't tell us all the details so think for yourself.

ryssee

This will sound harsh, but I'm being truthful. Listen to your instincts. She's not interested in you, she's interested in a green card. Time to move on. Save your money for someone who cares about you. You'll find someone who loved you for who you really are, a generous person who wants to marry a nice person with the same interests as you. Good luck!

RÐµdisca

I am a Russian-American woman, and I can assure you -- contrary to some of the answers here -- that our libidos work just like everyone else's. When we are dating someone we like, we welcome the invitation to take it to the next level; when we are dating someone we don't care for, we drag our feet. Russian women don't need any more time than "Latin" women to "get warmed up" to someone they are attracted to. And there is nothing in Russian culture that limits the physical expression of affection any more than in Western cultures.

Shyness? Please, she's 26, not 15.

Besides, given the fact just how loose sexual mores have become in Russia in the last decade or so (trust me, Vegas has got nothing on Moscow), I really don't think that this woman's behavior should be attributed to such hilarious causes as chastity or shyness.

Sorry, my friend, but it's obvious this woman is just not into you. Your wallet, maybe. Your American (?) citizenship, definitely. But not YOU. Forget her. And, a word of advice -- don't use the Internet to find a wife. Baaad idea. It seems easy, but trust me -- you have no idea what you are getting yourself into.

sbtxoxo

ok russian people are not cold. i am italian, and i have a russian boyfriend, and i lived in russia for a couple months this year. they are stereotypically cold, but to people they know and in general, they are warm, friendly, and loving. are u sure she wants this for the right reasons? if u are paying for everything, and u can feel that she is not interested, maybe just re-evaluate the relationship. are u sure u love her enough to continue dealing with this?

Patty

well when woman do tht..they mostly either not trust u..or maybe shy?? it's like they feel u may leave them whenevr so they dont want to rush into things. just give it some time..let her get to "know" u more personally. patience. if she loves u..then u need patience. :))

Hoplite

I don't have time to read what the others answer and comment but I read your story.

Take my word seriously because I am not russian but I have many russian friends and I even speak their language.

She doesnt likes you or she has some personal issues (like depression). In any way you should let her and go on with your life. There are many girls from all over europe and espcially eastern europe that you will find sweet and affective.

I never trusted those internet meeting sites. There are many chating programs that you can meet girls even from your home town. Try skype, icq or something like that.

Be careful in eastern europe, girls might look friendlier but they will have no problem use you for your money. Life there is difficult and makes them more hard. Especially if you are looking for love, you are an easy target and you will hurt more.

summerqueen_001

Maybe she`s really shy? You should definately talk to her about it. If a guy flew all the way to europe to come see me, (even though i dont live in europe), the least he`d deserve is a kiss. So yeah just talk to her about it and ask her what`s wrong. GOod luck

sonya10

hello! I am Russian and I do have some Americans friends working in Eastern Europe. Great guys! some of them were 'not so happily marriage' previously to a Russian women, but still attracted to them.
A girl...Did you ask her to move to the USA? What did she answer?Is she ready to move so far away? Did you consider the possibility to move to Russia? Suggest her that and see her reaction.

As for me I am married to a Dane, we met on business trip. At the moment we reside in Denmark...I simply can't imagine my life without going every 3rd month to Eastern Europe to meet my parents, relatives and friends. I hope in 5-7 years well move to Eastern Europe. --> not all the people fancy moving abroad. Don't think all Russian girls are dreaming about getting a Green card.

Joannah

Act like a 28 year old then. The warning signs are there and what's worse is that she thinks you're not even worth some affection. What's the next thing for you to do when you know someone is hitting you up for money? Roll up that panting tongue Romeo!

HolyWars

are u nuts??

why dont u look for a girl from your own country??

She dousnt love you, she loves her future greencard.

Sfsun

Ok, I don't know the story other than what you wrote here, but are you absolutely sure she's not just trying to get her green card? I mean, can you really fall in love with someone over the internet, and have it be real? If it is, then kudos for you, but maybe you should think about what real love is and what a fulfilling relationship would be for you. Are you just trying to find someone to fill the loneliness? I'm not trying to be harsh, but you have to be fair to her and to yourself - if this isn't going to be something that is positive and helps you grow as people and support each other well into old age, then it's not worthy of marriage.

Sandy B

This is also a difficult prediction for her as well. why dont you ask her? What do you expect out of someone you met.....um....twice? invite her to the states to be with you for a couple of weeks...but you must pick her up and drop her off so save your pennies....another major thing is most russians are not too fond of americans...for the fact they take all their women.....good luck

LivÃ¡n

There are cultures that are ......so cold, different to Latin people, if you are looking for some sweet, forget Russian people or wake up her feelings, teach her like love American people.

vaggos1944

you must have some Italian blood in you Russian women takes a while to worm up and she maybe realizing she has to face the truth with a stranger and also she might have a boyfriend there and she has to brake up with him have you seen her horoscope? Leos they a little reserved and Scorpios need a lot affection you have to warm up things good luck if she has a good looking mother or older sister let me know!!

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