What should I expect while dating a Turkish man from Istanbul?

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Saffron

Well from personal experience, as I am an American gal dating a Turkish man as well (a little over a year to be precise), I can say my boyfriend is kind, sweet, funny, treats me with respect, respects my beliefs ( I am Christian, he is Muslim), and loves me for who I am and I him.

As wonderful as this may sound, do not go into the relationship expecting all Turkish men to be like this. I mean no disrespect; I am merely saying a general question like this is acting as if Turkish men came off assembly lines like cars. It doesn't work like that.

If you go into the relationship expecting the man to act a certain way based on his ethnic background, it could potentially backfire. But do not go into the relationship with no expectations; go in with the expectations any woman should have when dating any man: expect him to respect you and your beliefs (tho he may not agree with them), love you (and you him), not to force you into anything you do not want to do or feel comfortable doing, etc. At the same time treat him as you would want to be treated.

Just get to know him better. Your heart will know if he is worth it. Trust me, my heart did it for me. :)

Ipek K

Expect to get what you give to the relationship. Turkish men are just regular men. Nothing more and nothing less.

That is again a very odd question. What would your answer be if I ask :"What should I expect while dating a man from San Francisco? "

It is weird for us to see Americans are stereotyping everything and everybody.

expatturk

Ipek K and Saffron have it right. Men are men, judge them not on their nationality but on their individual words and actions. Of course your man's cultural background influences him, but then so does yours. Take the time to explore each other -- ask questions.

smkalpakci

As some of the others have stated men are men. I am American, married to a Turk for 3 years (together for almost 7) and we have a 6 month old together. My husband is very honest, sweet, and loving. Not all are like this, not all are dogs either. You get a whole range. I must say though that generally Turkish men that have lived for a while in a western country are generally good guys. I have been living in Istanbul for over 4 years now and you see and hear about all types. In general Turks are very close to their families. They are either highly educated or lowly educated. They are usually very generous and will help anyone. But to be honest you really do find all types. Just treat him like any other boyfriend and listen to your head and heart.

pumpkin

it totally depends on the man, there are Turkish men who are big machos and they believe their word is the last word; but there are also lovely guys who treat their girlfriends like queens, so I hope you had made a lucky choice:))) but from experience I can tell you that all the Turkish men love being pampered;)

Claudia

You can find good and bad Men all over the world in every country.

genÃ§ tÃ¼rk

I can't believe the first three answerers.

Just make sure the guy is not an illiterate construction worker from southeast.

EDIT: @Truth seeker: If you are really a truth seeker you should reveal the truth about your identity and allow email please. Why are you so protective against them anyways is your real father one?

catwoman

What to expect ? Lots of sex and being ignored otherwise while he spends his time with the guys. Turks are very family orientated and unless you are a muslim he is unlikely to marry you. They treat their wives with great respect but it is a very different way of life for a western woman. Enjoy what you can from the relationship but don't get too involved. Sorry, if this is not what you want to hear.

Erkan and Angie Lee K

well i am turkish man and my wife is jamaican and i love her respect her ..its not a turkish american black or brown white thing its love and undersatnding..

STEWIE

He will try to live with his heart while you will try to live with your head. Think of what can happen

.:::Niko:::.

you better watch out!!!! full moon will transform him into a werewolf 'n he'll eat you alive

oludenis567

as far as I am avare that the Turkish/muslim man just like a another man they do not like their girlfriend/wives to be sleep around and they doesn't like everyone around them to call them a slapper/ hore e.t.c.

Sweet_P

Ok, u want my experience of Turkish men? I have met three in my life. Once was at my last workplace, whom to cut a long story short left me no choice but to press sexual harassment charges on. The second was my friend (for a while) but we don't talk anymore as he keeps calling women sluts and whores and things like that. The third I dated for two months, and he turned out to b married. U do the maths.

M dub

your date is probably well educated with some money in his family in order to be here. he is probably very westernized and you don't have too much to worry about.

small stuff:
1) they avg. 10 glasses of black tea per day....get some of the real stuff (loose tea not in the bag) to have on hand - if you like him.
2) they can be superstitious culture
3) greeting: one kiss on each cheek (more of a touch cheeks briefly with a kiss sound) is like shaking hands. if you hang out with his turkish friends you will see they do this for both man and woman and it is OK for you to do so.

good stuff: they can be extremely polite and may treat you with respect and courtesy. He may be more polite and genuine than most American men you know.

potential pitfalls: prostitution is legal in brothels in turkey! Prostitutes are registered with special ID cards and undergo monthly medical exams. even thought here is a social stigma to being a prostitute, I know Turkish professionals who have no moral problems with being married and visiting brothels (having sex) on a regular basis. the concept can be like owning a car but taking a taxi occasionally. gentleman's clubs so to speak.

i know an turkish american here in NYC (highly respected banker), who is married w kids and his dad was/is a brothel regular, took him on his 18th birthday to become a "man". He has tried to be good by only going to massage parlors and getting hand jobs / happy endings. Very highly educated people (MD's). Both him and his father married women who turn a "blind eye".

If the latter is a deal breaker for you, just be honest and ask him his opinions on the subject - trust me, you will want this conversation if you do not like this part of some turkish culture. (you can discuss but keep it light/joking)

if he does not see a problem with this, and you do then no matter ho much you like him it will have to end. you will not change him.

if you are not strong enough (mentally), you should avoid this.

Randy

I lived in Izmit for sevral years (west of Istanbul). While you can never say for sure how someone will treat another person I can tell you that Turkey, while being the most Westernized mostly Muslim country is still quite Muslim. This being said, I assume because he came to America he will not force you to wear a burka. He may not be as laid back as most American men, but he will probably be much more progressive then most Turkish men.

Hurricane

Like in everywhere in the world,it depends on the person.Most Turkish guys are kind and gentle towards women.But some of them are quite rude.But in general Turkish guys treate women in a way that they want to be treated.They know that all women are precious and fragile.

Crazy Turkish Guy

I could easily answer this question since all Turkish men are exactly the same;

1-We will tread you like dog-poo and throw you in the garbage
2-We will make sure to speak to you in a language you can't understand
3-Since we are blood thirsty, we will lure you in to a dark alley and bite your neck and drain your blood so you could become a vampire just like the rest of us.
4-We will make you cover up and convert you to a Muslim girl

As you could see the answers above, this is how we all are.

Hey I have some questions for you,

What should I expect when dating an Australian woman?
What should I expect when dating an Asian woman ?
What should I expect when dating an African woman?
What should I expect when dating an American woman?

Thanks......

Rak

Man dating a women not wanting to marry her is no real man. He no have moral. You want man like that?

the truth seeker

Genc Turk I was just wondering did any of those construction workers offered you a candy in one of those constructions when you were young?

Gretchen V

Expect to be treated like a princess until he gets comfortable, then expect to be treated like dog doo.

r e

to not understand anything he is saying

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