Would you raise your children in Turkey?

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Totally Blunt

Hmmm. Interesting question.

As a Turk, I like my country quite well.

But assuming I had an international family with different options for residence...

1. I would look at the physical surroundings: is it child-friendly? Are there parks for the children to play in? Is the atmosphere, the neighborhood clean and noise-free?

2. I would consider my financial situation: will my money be enough to live in a good neighborhood with sophisticated people?

3. I would consider the schools: are they adequate education-wise? Are they nice places (physically) for the children to spend most of their time in?

4. I would consider the culture: is it an open, friendly, anti-racist culture? Will they let me raise my children with MY own values?

Turkey sure has very nice places to live which meet above criteria, but there are other places where life is harder, too. Like in all other countries. So, your best bet would be to evaluate your own circumstances and decide accordingly. In any case, we are here to answer your questions if you need help.

SarahEsen

Well, I can give you my own experience on this. I am British and my husband is Turkish and we have two children the ages of 6 and 8 and I have found pros and cons to raising them here. But then again, wherever you bring up your children there are always going to be pros and cons no matter where you live..

Firstly, the good things about raising them here:
(Please note I live in the Mugla region in a touristic area and it is less built up here than most of the bigger cities)

Family is considered important. There is a real family unity here which is nice for the children mentally.
Street crime is much less here than say, other parts of the world. I can happily go put my rubbish out at midnight and not feel like I have to watch my back.
People love children here. If you are walking down the street with your child, some random person may well come up to you, stop you, and fuss over your 'pretty' child. I must admit I found this hard to adapt to at first but the people do it because they genuinely love children and that is their way.
In the long summertimes you can go to the beach/picnics etc and have so much fun outdoors with your children.

Now for the cons:

Children start school at age 6. We sent our children to playgroups before this age because they really needed the stimulation and socialization. Not only that, but they needed to pick up the language too to help them at school.
There is a saying here which is 'childhood ends when school starts'. The children here gets lots and lots of homework which is stressful for them and us. There is lots of pressure on parents too to do the work with them because the teachers have not got the time to do it themselves. I have other friends here which say the private schools (which are terribly expensive) are even more demanding.
Say, for instance, your child is having difficulty with Maths. The teacher will not stay a half hour or so after school or during school breaks to help that child, instead the teacher will recommend that you, the parent, get extra lessons provided outside of school. If your child is falling behind with work, then basically it is your responsibility to get that child up to standard grades. The teachers consider it not their responsibility.
You also have to provide the school with stationary/paper/extra money for things they require. And then there is the end of term 'school plays' which are over the top and unneccessary. The teachers want you to fork out alot of money for a costume that they want!

I find it very hard bringing up my children here simply because the lack of laws and common sense in people here. It really is frustrating sometimes. But alas, I will not drag on because this is the life we have chosen and there must be far worse situations than us.

Good Luck whatever you decide. Make sure you have some good close friends by your side to get you through the difficult (and good) times.

EDIT: I would just like to say how many answerers here have no personal experience in raising children here, yet they are quick to judge mine.

wuthering heights, did I mention age 3 was the ideal age? My children were very bored at home before age 6 and needed more stimulation than what I could give them. They loved playgroup and my children are doing very well at school - their school reports show this.
Can you give me some sources where you say it is proven that school earlier damages children, please.

''That's why their general knowledge is much better than the average British person's, I guess.''
Lady S, let me take this opportunity to give you these facts about Turkey here on Literacy
http://globaledge.msu.edu/countryInsights/statistics.asp?countryID=76®ionID=2
and please now compare Literacy in Turkey to that of Britain's:
http://globaledge.msu.edu/countryInsights/statistics.asp?countryID=78®ionID=2

Now let me define the word Literacy

The traditional definition of literacy is considered to be the ability to read and write, or the ability to use language to read, write, listen, and speak[1]. In modern contexts, the word refers to reading and writing at a level adequate for communication, or at a level that lets one understand and communicate ideas in a literate society, so as to take part in that society. The United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) has drafted the following definition: "'Literacy' is the ability to identify, understand, interpret, create, communicate, compute and use printed and written materials associated with varying contexts. Literacy involves a continuum of learning to enable an individual to achieve his or her goals, to develop his or her knowledge and potential, and to participate fully in the wider society." In modern times, illiteracy is seen as a social problem to be solved through education.

Turkey is still a developing country, whereas the UK is not, so therefore, going by these facts and statistics, how can you say that the average Turkish person has more common knowledge?

Edit 2: Baris Awareness, where is efsane's answer? Did she delete it? I am assuming she slated me again in her answer and then deleted it because I cant find it anywhere.

Thanks for sticking up for me *thumbs up for you* :-)

arpsy

Well i am mexican and i am raising my daughter on turkish culture basis, too mee it is very good because at least in the city i live there is still the flavour of respect of generations. May daughter is begining to talk and one of her few words she use alot is abi abla, she learnt to kiss the hand of elderly and whenever we visit her grand mother in mexico she kiss her hand my mother and my sisters are so pleased to see how charm and respectfull she is. Other think is that in here you still can make your children go to park and play with the sand or go with other children with out worries about something wrong will happen outside. İ see children enjoying playing outside not just watching tv or playing internet. Other thing education sistem is good is a little bit crazy but if your children is able to get in to a good university in future he would be succesfull profesionist.
For me security is one of the most importants things and i see it here in Turkey so i am happy to rise my girl here.

GuEsS WhO???

Владимир GO GET A LIFE. WHATS WRONG WITH TURKS AND MUSLIMS. IM BOTH TURKISH AND MUSLIM AND GUESS WAT IM PROUD OF IT.

Ekrem K

Yes, i will do that because the view of Istanbul is very marvelous and the school at istanbul are much better.
Turkey is beautiful place it was ranked 7th on the most tourism

Kalverye

seriously, just one reason.

in turkey, there is a high held respect for parents, and you can beat your children, if you raise em in the states, they might turn out to be brats...

but other than that I cant think of anything....

dingdong

as a mother i would happily raise my kids in Turkey.

Sarah its proven starting school in early age like 3 has no beneficial effects. instead its proven it damages kids self esteem and cause unnecessary school stress in early age. 3 for gods sake still a baby

Lady S

Yes, why not? At least they respect family and traditional values, which is rare to find nowadays in the rest of the world, especially America/Australia/Western Europe/Northern Europe.

And to that British woman who lives in Turkey: Actually, I don't think it's bad that school is so demanding and that teachers ask a lot from children. That's why their general knowledge is much better than the average British person's, I guess.

BuseTurk

Yes and No...
Yes because culture in Turkey is so rich and family means a lot in Turkey. I mean..think about it... when someone wants to marry a girl they have to ask the family fore their blessing. Family means everything.. No because education in Turkey is not the best ive heard and it is hard to get into college. Also the government is corrupt so I don't know what I would do if I had kids ... They are turning Turkey into a mini Iran

Trotsky vs Kerensky-дахэ дэи

Of course I would, actually I was thinking about this the other day. I think it's good to raise a child in Turkey because family is very important here. What's more beautiful than a table full of family members? :) This isn't to say youngsters in Turkey are not independent. My understanding of independence does not necessarily mean leaving the house when one feels 'old' enough and spending the rest of your life ignorant of your family.

Russia would be the last country I guess, perhaps the reason why Vladimir is so averse to the idea of raising a child in Turkey is because most Turkish parents are responsible enough not to allow their kids to start high amounts of alcohol consumption at the age of 12.

Mariam Abdel Baky

YES, YES, YES!!
It's a wonderful place to been and a quite diverse country.
It is also safe, to a very large extent and the people are morally well.

♥Barış Awareness♥

I personally would not raise
my children in any place where
people like esfane feel non-turks
living in this country should
be exploited and ridiculed
for their humanitarian concerns.

This to me is very discouraging
at any level of a society, and
also should be concluded as
a supporting factor in how the
children are being raised there.

Oh and I rather think BS
is more apt to be found in
a comment trying to disqualify
the efforts of another human being
trying to raise some awareness
instead of trying to conceal it.

Facts without bias influence
attached is what is needed to
make such an important decision.

And in societies where children
are being raised to cover-up
abuse, and laws are enforced
against promoting awareness
is the biggie of all biggies
that can't be ignored.

My personal prediction is unless
things change, this country will
always find a home on the
top 10 list for the worse countries
in the world to raise children.

And esfane I could never give you
a thumbs down, for I truly believe
you are a victim to the cruel
and inhumane values you are
being forced to uphold.

I just feel very sorry for you is all.

Note to esfane:
I find it more discouraging
that my answer has not
helped you but more made you
feel personally attacked. That
was not my attention.

How is it that you have
overlooked laws of your
country and considered not
a vital factor in the up
bringing of a child?

How can this one woman
possable change the poverty level
of entire country, which you
claim prohibits humane
treatment of farm animals?

All her comments were her
opinion, how you choose to
react is your business, but
not allowing her to express it
and pointing her out as a
blame game seeker or not
sincere is just wrong.

Think about what you are saying
about the school system, how
can you say that money can be a factor
in a teachers obligation to teach
your children?
How can all parents be made to teach
their children without considering some
may have not more than a elementary
education themselves.
An underpaid teacher still can not
be excused from meeting
the child's educational needs.

And furthermore I certainly can't
make any changes in your
country. Believe me, I wish
things you say she should do
were as easy as you try and
make them appear to be.

gugu

Yes, I would.
If one day I will have a child I will certainly raise him/her in Turkey.
That's not only because I'm Turkish.
In Turkey, especially in İstanbul there are some fantastic schools and universities. They are one of their kind, like Galatasaray Lisesi or Robert collage or Boğaziçi University.

≠

Turkey is for Turks. I would not raise children ANYWHERE with a significant portion of Muslims. I would only raise my children around their own people and their own culture. Holy Russia.

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