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Grace

I have a question about Italian culture...

I'm not sure how to word my question, so I'll give an example. In some countries, it is considered very rude not to take off your shoes when entering a person's home. In the U.S., you only take off your shoes if you are asked to specifically (most people don't ask you to though)...it's not an automatic gesture. Is there anything that Italians might consider rude but Americans don't (or vice versa)? I just don't want to accidentally offend anyone...

Also, I heard it's considered impolite to turn down food in Italy? It's impolite here, too, if you're invited to someones home for dinner and you turn your nose up at the food...that's not what I mean. The general perception here is that Italians are big eaters (not meaning fat or anything like that...they just love food) and that second helpings and meal time or very large portions are expected. I'm a very light eater...will I offend anybody if I ask for a smaller portion (I figure that's better than not being able to finish the food on my plate) or saying no to second helpings?

Sorry if it sounds like I'm generalising...I don't mean to. I know not all Italians are the same, just as not all Americans are the same. But, there are some things that a large group of people can and do have in common...

Thank you for the help!

    



Show all answers


cosmic
There’s nothing that Italians might consider rude but Americans don't! Don’t worry at all!
Our culture is the same as yours!
I always keep my shoes on and nobody ever asked me to take them off!!!

To be polite simply means to say “please” (per favore), “may I?” (posso?), “thanks” (grazie), “you’re welcome” (prego).

If you're invited to someone’s home for dinner and you turn your nose up at the food… well, that’s impolite, of course! But I know that's not what you mean. If you're invited to someone’s home for dinner you can say that you’re a light eater and ask for small portions and say no to second helpings.
It’s a little bit easier in the North of Italy… Southern people tend to insist more: it’s not that they take offence, it’s just that they want to put you at your ease, so they will tell you “Do not stand on ceremony! Feel free to eat as much as you want!” (Non fare complimenti! Mangia quanto vuoi!). I understand that you’re not going to stand on ceremony, but someone could think so.
Simply say “No, thank you, I really mean it” (No, grazie, davvero senza complimenti) and smile: you won’t offend.

If you’re going to eat in restaurants: no problems at all! Nowhere!

We love good food …and we think that foreign tourists love Italian food more than we do! That’s why sometimes you could find large portions: it’s just a way to say “welcome to Italy, enjoy your meal!”
Don’t worry, ask for small portions or leave food in your plate: there’s no problem at all.

Now I tell you one important thing: the more expensive is the restaurant, and the more you’ll find small portions: it’s strange, but sometimes that’s the way it is!

Have a nice trip!

Where are you staying?


Elizabeth
Rating
I spent three months living with a family in Trento, TN, Italy and found that customs were mostly pretty similar (and where they weren't, they were easy to pick up).

Dinner table manners are a little bit different--Italians eat with both hands above the table. It's still rude to put your elbows on the table, but your left forearm should rest flat on the table on the left side of your plate. It's rude to keep your hands in your lap! The family's twelve-year-old daughter explained that Italians joke that Americans keep our hands in our laps so that we can quickly pull our guns out of their holsters.

The only thing that really threw me for a loop was grocery store customs, specifically in the produce aisle. When you buy produce at an Italian grocery store, you're supposed to put on the little plastic gloves provided. You then bag the produce and take it over to a little scale, where you punch in the item number (it's next to the price of the vegetable), and the machine prints out a sticker that you then put on the bag. I didn't do all this the first time I bought produce, and my Italian wasn't good enough to understand the cashier's instructions (she explained that I needed to get the number for the item, and so I went back to the aisles, read the number, and came back and told her. She rolled her eyes and said, "No, non è così."). Thankfully, the man behind me in line offered to help me and showed me the little sticker machine.

Everyone was really helpful and encouraging, though, particularly as I learned more and more Italian. Have fun!


.Laura
Rating
In england when they asked me to take off the shoes i found that embarassing really and in italy no one would ask you a things like this...and i felt a bit disgusted about the idea to walk with my bare feet on that carpets...is not considered higyenic in italy...also in italy we dont have carpets is seen as a wierd thing
another thing considered rude is not to have bidets; all over the world you dont find them and we find this very wierd and gross specially for women...my mum would not believe when i told her i have to do without
to refuse food is not rude...this is a hollywood crappy movies view...no one would never force you to eat...they just appreciate if you show that you like the food...but you are not a duck to fill in....


Mirko
Rating
cultural habits in italy and u.s. aren't so different as someone might think. you don't have to take off your shoes (nobody does that) and about the meal, people will often ask you how big you'd like your portion (generally) and if they won't, just ask to have a smaller portion, no problem, you won't seem rude. so, don't worry!
sorry if i made mistakes
ciao :-)


claudia
Rating
hi, I am Italian.
Nothing results impolite for us..I mean italian people is generally friendly and helpfull so don't worry...just follow the rules your education has given you.:D
About the food in a restaurant just leave in the plait if you do not finish the meal..at home usually you can controll your portion meanwhile the cooker is plaiting it...and if it is not like this, in a friendly environment...there will be someone else asking you if he can eat your remaining food!!!:D
Do not take out your shoes...we do not use to do it..
Be your self....that's wath we like!!!


lady_delish
Rating
hi i`m italian i think this is a really good question i mean it`s great that people ask information so they act politely when they go abroad! anyway do not worry you do not have to take off shoes or stuff like this just be polite...concerning the food usually in houses portions are about 70 g of pasta and then there`s a second meal which is usually or fish with vegetables or meat with vegetables and there there's fruit or dessert eat the most you can...anyway do not forget that food is much different from america (i`ve been to us so i know what i am talking about) we do not east much fried things i don`t thing you`ll have problems.....be polite clean and have respect for elder people you don`t know enjoy...i forgot what you might find different is the time we have meals we have breakfast around 7 am and it`s different (usually we have a different coffe the famous espresso anh yougurt or milk with cereals or a fruit never all of these things) then we have lunch around1 pm with pasta ecc and dinner around 8-9 pm without pasta


Funky fresh (:
I'm italian, and my grandparents are straight from italy. Well, sicily. Turning down food isn't necessarily impolite, it just may or may not offend the cook. If some italians give you a too generous portion of spaghetti eat only a little, and then say it's so good I should save some and bring it to ________ That's what i usually do with my family :)


Dario87
I'm italian too...
Well, about the thing of take off yor shoes, we think as the same of the americans.. someone could ask you to take off them, but i don't think that'll happen.. But if you want to appear as a good person, you could take off your shoes without them to ask you to do it...
But generally we think it as the same of you...
Aout food.. that's more complicated.. well, it depends on where you'll go.. if you go to south italy (I live in turin, in the North) maybe they could offend if you refuse some food... Of course they will never obligate you to eat all, but they'll appreciate if you at least taste what they'll give.. in the north is different, we don't give all that importance to the food (many italian jokes against south italian is about food!), so, nobody will offen if yuo don't finish all the food...
So, don't worry, be happy and have a good and nice trip ok??
ciao!
Dario


>Skeggia<
Rating
hello i am an italian girl I speak english not in a good way.. sorry!! but i would tell you that the Italy is the best country
for the food,the people,the cities the monouments and tne beach!!!!! ALL IS BEAUTY IN ITALY


bye bye KISSES FROM ITALY!!!!!!!!!!*********


roger 21
In Italy we think that only "stupid japans" take off their shoes..because have houses of rice..and floars of wood..
No problem for food...


♥кяч●
Rating
i'm italian
i don't speak english
and...non ho capito niente!


AlÇťX
Rating
in italy you dont have to take your shoes when u enter someones house
you can turn down the food, but they will just keep coming back
and yes they are big eaters but its not like unhealthy food its good food


Martha Y
Italians are not big eaters they will serv you antipasto then a little pasta then the meal but small portions they dont eat breaksfast like we do here they have coffee and biscotti -and for lunch a Panini- they take a siesta from 12 to 3 and then diner arround 9





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